10/24/10--Is it OK...?

Today's run: 5 miles (49:24)

Week to date: 5 miles

Month to date: 35 miles

So... yeah.

I didn't run at all last week. Not one single mile, not one single day. And, I am not proud of myself at all, because this week was a lot of pouting, eating bad things or not eating at all. Instead of dealing with my problems like a mature, healthy, active adult, I went back to being a petulant teenager/college student with all of the nasty behavior (and spontaneous crying jags to boot).

And you know what? I'm owning this. I can't pretend this didn't happen, and jump back in to my routine here of making the best meal choices I can think of and trying to hit mileage goals like I didn't revert back to my old self for a week.

Source.

I'm owning it, but I'm moving forward.

Or, so I wanted to, anyway.

I set out on a 5 mile run this morning, after this exchange went on in my head for a good half hour:

The Slacker: Uuuuhnnggnnhhh, it's so cold and damp and dreary outside. I don't want to run.

The Inner-Coach-Mom: So? Go run.

tS: Uuhhmmnngghhgghhh, but my pjs are so comfy... can'tI just go longer tomorrow?

tICM: You said that yesterday. Go run.

tS: Uunnnhhhggghhhnnhhggghhhh, but what if I get shot by someone out hunting?

tICM: WHAT? You're just making stuff up now. Wear bright colors and GO RUN!

tS: Uhhhhnnnnngghhguuhgggnnnhhggnhhhh, FINE.

(If anyone reading is unfamiliar with how it works, when you're running in an area that there may be people hunting (which in the UP is pretty much anywhere...), you're supposed to wear blaze orange, or at the very least something bright colored that screams, "Hey, I'm not an animal, don't shoot me!)

At least it gives me a reason to wear this shirt:

Oh, the things we do for love...

So, I finally got out the door, and I decided something: Let's see how fast I can do this! I did 8 miles the other day in 1:17 and change.... let's see if I can do a 5 miler in 45! I mean, I'm not talking a blistering pace here, I'm talking barely sub-9's.

Yeah. That SO didn't happen. I felt like I was running through Jell-O out there, and I came back in a blistering 49:24. So, instead of running barely-sub-9's, I ran just-barely-sub-10's. I ran slower than I ran last week on the 8 miler. I ran slower than I ran a freaking 13.1 miler!

I'm going to view it as punishment for my behavior last week. I am better than this, and your body can't do the absurd things you ask of it on a Sunday morning if you haven't done anything to help it along for the previous week.

I sit in the box and I feel shame.

OK. Time to play lunch delivery service for the Boyfriend--he's alone at work today and can't leave to get food. Have a great day!